2am thoughts - D-5

As I promised to myself, I would try my best to write whenever I feel things, because procrastinating will only make me regret for not recording the present moment and I will tend to forget them.

I’m currently 5 days away from my flight back to Malaysia and it’s 2am. It’s been a few days since I sleep at this hour because I am anxious about the current situation in Malaysia. Will I be prepared when I go home given that New Zealand is like the country that is exempted from the pandemic haha. 

It’s also heartbreaking to say goodbye to Taufiq and say hello to long distance relationship, which we’ve never done for a long period of time before. The most we’ve done is 3 months, and the fact that we live 435km away from each other in this pandemic situation, 😭. Not only that, spending my two years here with my alternate sisters made it harder to say goodbye knowing that we won’t live with each other anymore. I literally tell every single thing that happened in my life to them, and that shows how much I trusted them. And another shout out to my geng masak masak: my alternate sisters and brothers that never fails to cook dinner almost every week & always agree to play games, eat and watch movies together. Last but not least, Cantereaglez and other Keas simply for existing. My college and uni lifewere made better because of you guys. I could never imagine meeting other people. Safe to say that these bunches are the kindest and most supportive people I’ve ever met. 

But you know what’s the saddest part? 

It’s definitely acknowledging that I will forget these memories, or worst, these people somewhere in the future just like how I forget my school memories. And in case I ever forget you, pls know that it’s unintentional and please don’t take it by heart, my memories are just easy to be wiped out from my mind idk why 😔

I hope my future self would recall some memories by reading this post somewhere.